When our hearts ache and it seems we can’t go on…how do we trust God in those difficult times?
Read on to discover the beauty of lament…and discover 9 ways to keep our faith in Him when times get tough.
Breeze slowly bends, slightly eases past as sunshine beams down
upon the blossoms beckoning.
Every year, I’m aware of the common miracle of these buds in bloom.
Year after year passes, and they do not fail to show their glory to the world, to anyone willing to venture a trip to witness wonder.
Yet year after year passes for us, and the wonder I’m waiting for in our own lives fails to show.
Like I can count the rings of the tree, canvassing the course of my own history deep within its folds.
Seven rings.
Seven years.
Seven years since we started our first adoption attempt.
Four years since we began pursuing international adoption, hearts landing upon China.
Over two years since we found our little girl, our little China doll.
And over two years since, had we been on a normal timeline, we would have swept her up, brought her home, made her a part of our family.
The world has since recovered from the massive COVID hold it endured in 2020 and 2021. Stores opened, vacations planned, travel resumed.
And yet – we still wait.
My, how time passes.
When you’re aching for an answer, longing for a miracle, does the passage of time sting within you, too?
I cannot begin to tell of all that’s transpired in my heart during these difficult times.
The
praying
pleading
crying
reasoning
begging for answers…
trying to make sense.
How can you hold fast when the path-without-end wears upon your will, your patience, the faith to which you clung so closely?
How can you trust God in difficult times?
The answer lies in the beauty of lament.
TRUSTING GOD IN TRIALS – A STEP IN LAMENT*
You can trust God in difficult times when you follow the example of lament shown in the Psalms. This is a 4 step process of turning to God, voicing your complaints, asking boldly, and lastly, trusting God in your trial.
Lament – what exactly is this word, so rarely heard, yet filled with wonders only the Creator can fashion?
Lament is the process of bringing our sorrow to God during difficult times; it’s the beautiful what-to-do while waiting on God.
As we stated, our first post talked of the importance of always turning to God in our trials.
The second post addressed the whistling teapot, our soul burdened with its own heavy brew, needing to pour out complaint to a God who loves and listens.
Our last post touched upon the very bold step of ASKING GOD with confidence.
If you’ve missed any of these prior posts, make sure to check them out ❤️ so you’ll understand this entire precious process fully!
It is here we finally wrap up our rich journey and touch down in the treasures of trust.
Yes – this pathway has it’s end – our journey to reveal lament’s mystery concludes where it always intended: TRUST.
Trust in Him – in the midst of suffering.
But – when we’ve turned to him, unburdened our complaint, made our requests – how do we finally trust when we feel discouraged?
9 WAYS TO TRUST GOD IN DIFFICULT TIMES
Here are 9 helpful tips for trusting God when we’re walking in weariness:
1. Know His character
Recall a time a loved one let you down. 💔
In that moment, were you like me?
Did you make the mistake of only focusing on the rendered wrong, the offense so keenly felt?
Did you forget such loved one’s faithfulness to you over the years, letting those memories blow away in the breeze like a beautiful flower long gone?
When things go wrong, anguish distorts. We can begin to lose a hold on reality, in a small or large sense. The truth becomes convoluted, and at the mercy of our own misled perceptions and raw emotions. Even God Himself can appear to be against us.
As we’re encouraged to remember a loved one’s devotion to us, how much more should we remember His devotion? His faithfulness? His ultimate love and sacrifice?
Oh, the difficulty of discerning such large concepts…
Can we wrap our minds around a sense of who God truly is?
“Have I been with you so long, and you still do not know me? Whoever has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, ‘Show us the Father’? (john 14:9, word omitted)
Witness his deep within.
See his impassioned heart plea for his people
as he heals the sick,
raises the destitute,
cradles the young.
Dive into the depths of his mercy and compassion for the hurting and lost.
If we’ve encountered Jesus, we’ve encountered the Father.
Envelope yourself in His power to seek and save sinners.
He did that for you, too.
The outpouring of a Savior’s love is not to be taken lightly. Suffering for salvation’s end upon such shameful symbol of a cross, he wins our souls – yet, he secures even more for us, treasure beyond measure to behold in this lifetime and the next.
And his daily walk with us –
the care of one who pursues so intimately,
loves so dearly,
runs to us when we fall – covered in shame, clothed in rejection – and not away.
That is your Savior’s heart for you.
When life missteps in measuring up, can we still trust in His character, that He knows what is best and can make the greatest beauty bloom from the deepest tragedy?
Yes – He’s that amazing.
2. Rely upon scripture
Precious words in our hearts, our home, when we have access to our Bibles in the morning quiet, the afternoon pause, or the evening’s end to a full day.
But not only are those words on a page, used by the Holy Spirit to convict, guide, comfort, instruct…
They are your sword.
Your one weapon in this wearisome war that waits for no one and pits you against world, against enemy.
Against self.
When stuck in the dredges of despondency, cry in the manner of psalm 43,
Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God.
There are riches all throughout scripture – rely on them, memorize them.
One of my greatest scripture solaces lies in Romans 8:28
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
No matter what I’m going through, He will use it for my good and His glory.
Every. Single. Thing.
Wow.
Brandish the battle-axe and advance against the enemy’s attacks with a heart soaring hope in Him 💕
3. Look back
Oh precious one,
weary and battered,
turn your mind to a time when you weren’t here.
If you’ve been a believer long enough, you’ll have a treasure trove of memories when season’s sunshine reigned upon you. When the Lord felt as a close companion and all was well.
Now that this torrential windstorm of life has seemingly shaken the trees of life, can you reach into the recesses of mind and recall?
Can you remind that these seasons do not last forever?
Let yourself take heart in this, that are both times of ease and seasons of sorrow.
He was faithful in the easier times
He will be faithful in the difficult times.
4. Look ahead (Future Grace)
Yet another tool in your arsenal, Future Grace is often overlooked and underplayed. When that strength has ceased in the midst of suffering, fix your faith fast on the grace that awaits you. He gives grace for the past – for the present day – and amazingly, grace awaits you further down, an adequate source for your future self.
It’s that encompassing.
Check out more on future grace here:
5. Look for Nuggets
In every weary season, there are streaks of silver. Nuggets of gold. Our refining by fire deposits tiny treasures in our life. And sometimes, the not so tiny appear, as well.
What are these gems for you?
For us, as hard as it is to wait for our precious family member to finally arrive home, I can see the buds of growth in those agonizing years of wait:
💕 Growth in my own heart as I’ve grown closer to the Lord and learned to see Him as the ultimate gem.
💕 More time to help our child with special needs – needs we weren’t aware of until after we’d started the adoption process.
💕 Time to begin and mature other ministries – like this blog.
All of those He’s fashioned in this season of wait.
5. Understand God often has a very different plan or route for us to take
Oh, such suffering that sorrows the soul…on inspection, we see we’re met with
💔 Unmet expectations
💔 Unmet timing
💔 Or the two together, unhappy peas in a pod, garnishing the garden we tend
When we’re met with such that has been unmet, we must meekly reckon that God had a different plan for us than we had hoped.
In our mind’s eye, our family envisioned bringing home a toddler back in 2020, a bright addition to our crew.
Then COVID happened.
One of our kids struggled massively with a special need we’d been unaware of.
We felt the tight cords of life strangle around us as we felt we had all we could possibly handle.
And time has shown us…
God’s intent was something different all along.
He’s even been gracious to show a bit of why we couldn’t bring her home back then.
Before we know it, that toddler will be six.
So much time lost.
Or is it?
God promises to restore the years the locust has eaten.
‘The threshing floors shall be full of grain;
the vats shall overflow with wine and oil.
I will restore to you the years
that the swarming locust has eaten,
the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter,
my great army, which I sent among you.’
– joel 2:24-25
Though the book of Joel presents a different situation – the Lord brought upon starvation via a locust plague when His people turned from Him – the same principle applies.
The Creator of all things, material, space, and time, is able – and does – bring about such harvest of plenty and blessing after the sorrow.
Seen time and again in scripture – Job, Joseph, Hannah…
It is the beauty of His miraculous work.
The diamond crafted in the coals of refining fire.
The happy ending we were made to long for.
6. Make sure you’re following the steps of Lament
Hidden within the psalms, rich examples of the saints and their struggles, God has gifted us these four steps of lament.
Once you’ve doled out such depths of soul, boldly coming before Him and making your requests, your heart is primed to take the next step – Trust.
Make sure to utilize this valuable gift, so clearly illuminated in scripture for us.
7. Rely on the Body of Christ
In those darkest moments
when all in me wanted anything but reaching out to others
I have beheld a beautiful balm in letting myself be cared for by others.
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. 10 For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! 11 Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? 12 And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
– eccl 4:9-12
8. Distract Yourself
Residing in a whirlwind where thoughts, emotions, focus feel held by a central force, where nothing changes or perhaps everything changes all at once, we could do ourselves a favor and guide our gaze in a direction that deviates.
Get your mind off the situation for a few hours.
Enjoy life in an activity you haven’t held to lately.
Walk the boulevard, breathe in the blossom-filled air, assuming allergies aren’t an issue.
Experience God elsewhere that reminds you His loveliness and care for you still abounds.
9. Understand we haven’t reached the epilogue of our story
Deep down, in darkest days, it feels this is all our eyes will behold.
Our flesh cannot fathom an end to it. We measure the moment and count it eternal, such shall it always be.
We pronounce the way things are and cannot see outside the bubble we’ve created as home.
Yet – the seasons pass.
Things change.
Nothing stays the same.
Not even if we deal with chronic pain that presses upon us until we leave this earth, can we make the claim that this is always the way it shall be.
No. Instead, we’re called to constantly wait.
To continue in patience, to bear long-suffering.
There are things in this life that may not be answered until this life is complete.
We’ve failed to reach the end of the story until we’re standing before Him in glories and endless delights – our true and lasting home.
What a breathtaking day that will be! 💜
Until then, we forge ahead, knowing His mercies are there every day to meet us.
And as we turn to Him
voice our hearts grieved and groaning
boldly ask of Him
He will lead us to trust in Him.
One day at a time.
*These thoughts are not my own! They are largely taken from Mark Vroegop’s insightful and incredibly helpful book on lament. For more on the beauty and practice of lament, check out this amazing find, Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy, available at Amazon:
Looking for a resource (other than the Bible) to perfectly picture the tremendous heart of Christ? Check out Dane Ortland’s Gentle and Lowly. It’s a life-changing read and one of my top ten literary picks. My kids and I are going through it together right now!
Note: This post contains affiliate links. As an Amazon associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. However, I will only ever recommend products I love and truly believe will bring you value.
This is so full of truth! Thank you for this gift to us! I’m saving it for the next difficult season . . . Blessings!
You’re welcome, Stacey – so glad to hear it was a blessing to you! 🙂