What is the Real Beauty of a Woman?

The idea of beauty is defined not by standards of physical appearance, but by inner characteristics.

If I had a quarter for each magazine article clad with colorful, sultry women, donning the year’s trendy fashions, I’d be as rich as Smaug, engulfed in golden treasure in his castle mountain. Oh, a penny, even! In the heart of each woman, such scenes resonate, these glimpses of the world’s definition of beauty –

in the line at CVS
waiting for the dental hygienist
browsing the internet
turning on a TV program or movie
and on and on

Such visual pictures and deep-seated messages are impossible to escape, regardless of our position in or season of life. Even a casual conversation with an acquaintance can bring about more of that same message – this is what beauty is, drool after it, do what you must to attain it.

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. -2 Corinthians 4:16

Scripture refers to us being afflicted, perplexed, persecuted, struck down. Part of our affliction is living in this world and feeling the after effects of the fall every day. While Adam and Eve were lovely creatures, made to dwell forever in paradise, the fall brought along sin, toil, affliction, and death…

Our bodies are slowly wasting away as we creep closer and closer to the end of our lives on earth. Our outer self is wasting away.

A Portrait of Real Beauty

How can we talk about true beauty without a look at Proverbs 31?

If reading this portion of scripture makes you hang your head in defeat at this picture perfect feminine model, please know these are attributes of a godly woman – something to strive towards, but never something about which to feel guilty because we’re still traveling our own road and learning.

If the Proverbs 31 woman was truly real, she would also have her weaknesses and faults, they just aren’t listed in this radiant sonnet.

10 An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. 
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. 
12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. 
13 She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. 
14 She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. 
15 She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. 
16 She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. 
17 She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. 
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. 
19 She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle. 
20 She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. 
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet. 
22 She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. 
23 Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. 
24 She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant. 
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. 
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. 
27 She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 
29 “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.” 
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates. 

– Proverbs 31:10-31

There’s a lot packed in this section, to name just a few:

For those married, she’s not only a beautiful woman, but a wife her husband trusts and a mom her children look up to

💕 She’s hard working and wise

💕 She’s generous, giving, and kind

💕 She takes care of her household

💕 She fears the LORD

Ever noticed what’s left OUT of this poem of adoration?

What she looks like.

There’s mention of her clothing material, but that‘s reflecting more that her productivity has gleaned for her the ability to afford fine linen; purple is a color marked by higher standing and respect.

This proverb about the model of TRUE BEAUTY, one that’s touted to believers as a picture of the ideal women, doesn’t include physical features or adornments as reasons for her beauty. In fact, the importance of physical beauty is crushed, for “charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain.”

Let’s look at a snapshot of what is to come:

For this light momentary affliction [our outer selves wasting away] is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. – 2 Corinthians 4:17-18

Charm is deceitful, and Satan is the deceiver (Revelation 12:19; 13:14).

❓Aren’t all those beautiful, happy ads and lifestyles pictures a deception to our hearts?

❓Are we buying into the message that if we wear that and look like this, we’ll be as happy and smiley as the faces looking back at us?

❓Can we brandish our hearts to look not to the seen, but the unseen?

❓When we find ourselves longing after physical beauty in an unhealthy way, can we remember the rich, radiant beauty that comes from within?

❓And remember that no physical beauty in this world will last?

We simply cannot hold on to that. 

The most physically beautiful person today will not be so, come 20 or 30 years. Outer beauty is temporal, inner beauty is eternal. 

You Are Far More Precious Than Jewels.

The Truly Beautiful Inner Beauty

Real beauty is defined by what is found in the heart. The loveliest part of a woman will always be the love she has for God – a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. The God of the heavens is not preoccupied with our fancies of physical beauty, prowess, plastic surgery, or power – He is the giver of any natural physical beauty we might have, anyway.

The LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart -1 Samuel 16:7

His delight is in the hearts of those who delight in Him.

Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life.  – Proverbs 16:31

If we wisen as we‘re continually sanctified in age, then we will be our most beautiful in our latter years, when we’re all covered with wrinkles, adorning our crowns of gray hair.

The woman who has held fast to the Lord all her days, reflecting the glorious character of a righteous woman in her old age – that is the picture of true beauty.